


Hilf Mir

by Elri



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Caring, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Genderqueer Character, M/M, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-12
Updated: 2018-04-12
Packaged: 2019-04-21 19:09:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14291499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elri/pseuds/Elri
Summary: Caleb's had a rough day, Molly helps pick up some of the pieces"Let me help. A hundred years or so from now, I believe, a famous novelist will write a classic using that theme. He'll recommend those three words even over I love you."  -James T. Kirk, Star Trek





	Hilf Mir

**Author's Note:**

> Basically I had a few rough days and decided to live vicariously through Caleb for a little bit
> 
> Title translates to "help me"
> 
> Partially inspired by Sam Tsui's video "Clumsy"

They hadn’t expected things to go this way. Everyone was fine, but some only just barely. Maybe they’d gotten cocky, took down a few too many monsters and corrupt people and forgotten that they weren’t infallible. In any case, they weren’t likely to forget again anytime soon.

All of the if-onlys and the what-ifs kept spiraling around Caleb’s head as he wiped himself down. Even though he still didn’t like taking baths that often, he’d stopped being able to put up with the sight of bloodstains on his body and clothes.

 

Especially hers…

 

His breath caught in his throat and he clutched the rag tighter, hands shaking, as he remembered Nott’s small form falling to the ground, and her pale face as she bled out from the slash in her chest. He knew he’d blasted the thing with fire, and could remember the smell of burning flesh, but after that he’d been totally focused on reaching Nott and getting her the fuck away from the creature they were fighting. Jester had been by their sides in a flash, hands already glowing with healing magic, and stabilized Nott right away, but Caleb hadn’t let her go until after he’d carried her back to the inn where they were staying. She was still resting, but she’d woken up briefly and managed to drink some broth, too tired to say anything. The color had already returned to her cheeks, she was going to be fine.

 

But what if…

 

“Stop that,” Caleb whispered to himself, “it didn’t happen, and it’s not going to. I won’t let it.”

A rap on the washroom door startled him, “Caleb, y’alright in there?” It was Molly.

“Ja, ja, I’m fine. I’ll be out in a moment.”

“No rush, just wanted to make sure you hadn’t fallen in. We’re grabbing a bite downstairs if you want to join us.”

“Alright.”

 

There was a pause before Caleb heard Molly walking away, boots tapping down the hall. He looked back down at his hands and almost threw up when he thought he saw Nott’s dark blood coating them. They were back to normal almost immediately but he still took a few more minutes to scrub them down again before putting his damp clothes back on and stepping out. The hall was empty, he could hear the voices coming from downstairs, and he made his way to his and Nott’s room.

He opened the door and slipped in quietly, not wanting to disturb Nott. She didn’t stir as he padded across the floor to sit on his bed. Even though he didn’t have dark vision, he could make out her outline under the blankets and stared at it. He stayed dead silent so he could hear if she was still breathing, frozen in place. Normally when he was this anxious he fiddled with his diamond or pet Frumpkin but tonight he was too tired for even that.

It was maybe only half an hour later when there was a gentle knock on the door. For a moment, Caleb debated not answering but since it was probably one of the other Mighty Nein they would look in anyways. They did that when they were worried. Especially if it was Jester though the fact that he hadn’t heard her stage whisper from the other side of the door indicated someone else.

 

When Caleb opened the door, using his body to block the light from getting into the room, he saw Molly standing in the hall. They were holding a dish with a bowl of soup and two slices of bread.

“Hey, I thought you might be hungry.” Their brow furrowed as they looked at him. “Caleb, are you alright? You’re shaking.”

Actually, Caleb realized, he was shivering. His still-not-dry clothes were sticking to him and he hadn’t lit a fire or anything in the room. He hadn’t even realized he was cold. A stronger shiver raced through Caleb’s body and he curled in on himself a little, leaning on the doorframe.

“Caleb?” Molly’s hand reached out to his shoulder, their eyes getting wide when they felt the damp fabric, “Have you been sitting here in wet clothes?”

“Molly,” It felt like the cold had seeped all the way through his skin and up into his brain. “Hilf,” was the only thing he could manage before the next shiver took over, causing him to almost double over.

“Hey!” Molly put the food on the ground and grasped Caleb’s shoulders, “You with me, Caleb?”

He nodded blearily, leaning in closer to Molly’s body heat. “Ich brauche…bitte…hilf mir?“ Some distant part of his brain was trying to tell him he was showing weakness and desperation, exposing himself, but the rest was too numb to care.

“Hey, it’s alright, I’ve got you. Come on, let’s get you into something dry.”

Molly gently pulled Caleb away from the doorframe, wrapping an arm around his shoulders as they shut the door. The room they were sharing with Fjord was right across the hall so they brought him in and sat him down on the bed. He didn’t put up any fight or protest as they peeled his coat and shirt off, dressed him in one of their spares, and wrapped a blanket around him tightly.

“Stay here, ok, I’ll be right back.” Molly gave him a kiss on the forehead and stepped out to retrieve the food and let the others know what was going on. They found Caleb in the same position they’d left him in. He wasn’t shivering as much, but he was staring mindlessly at the floor, not fully present. “Jester offered to keep an eye on Nott,” Molly told him, sitting down with one knee up on the bed so they could face Caleb and balance the dish on their lap. “I don’t know if you’re hungry or not, but if you can, you need to eat.” When they didn’t get a response, they put a hand on his knee. “Caleb?” He turned to look at them. “Let me help.”

 

Molly had brought an empty mug up after talking to the others and they now poured the soup into that and handed it to Caleb, extracting his hands from inside the blanket so he could hold it. For a few moments he just clutched it tightly, trying to force the heat into his hands.

Once he’d taken the first sip, Caleb realized how hungry he actually was and had shortly emptied the mug. Molly handed him the bowl and the bread to let him sop up the last bit before taking the dishes and putting them by the door to bring downstairs later. When they walked back to the bed they tucked Caleb back into the blanket, kneeling down on the floor in front of him.

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but I’m here for whatever you need, ‘kay?”

Caleb nodded, tearing up as he clutched at the blanket, “I saw her fall, and there was nothing I could do. Her blood was all over my hands, but I couldn’t heal her. All my hands can do is hurt.”

“Now that’s not true,” Molly held out their hand, waiting till Caleb hesitantly put his in theirs, “See, that doesn’t hurt at all. And Nott is fine, she’ll be back to her usual mischievous self by morning. You got her away from the danger, Caleb; these hands,” Molly squeezed his fingers, “These hands held onto her, pulled her back, and probably saved her life.”

The tears started falling down Caleb’s cheeks and he slumped forward, hiding his face on Molly’s shoulder. They brought their other hand up to stroke the hairs at the nape of his neck, murmuring reassurances in his ear. Once he’d gotten past the initial wave, they moved so they were sitting next to him on the bed and wrapped an arm around him.

 

As the sobs faded out, exhaustion took over. Caleb leaned heavily against Molly’s shoulder and let himself take comfort in the presence of the other. He woke up a little when Molly kissed his head and got up, laying him down on the bed and putting his legs up after taking off his shoes. They ran a hand through his hair, pushing it out of his face, and Caleb brought his out from the blanket to grasp their wrist.

“I…don’t want to be alone,” He admitted quietly.

“Then I’m not going anywhere,” Molly promised. They pulled away to dress down for the night before gently scooching Caleb over so they could lie down with him, one arm resting across his waist. “It’s ok, you can rest now.”

“Thank you, Molly.”

“Good night, Caleb.”


End file.
